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When Jake Starr was elminiated from the Best of the Best tournament, his focus then shifted from earning bragging rights to earning something of tangible value, the SCW Television Championship. This transition was seen by Jake's friend, Greg Cherry, at Breakdown the night that Jake was supposed to receive his title opportunity, when Jake didn't come to his aide. The interference of Shaun Cruze, and the lack of backup Jake provided made Greg wonder if maybe Jake's mind wasn't on their friendship, but instead on the title opportunity ahead of him.
It's a feeling that hasn't sat well with Greg. Jake's complete ambivilence to his concern when it was brought to him rubbed him the wrong way, and he's out to get some answers, and figure out if this is a sign of things to come, or something he's reading more into than necessary. To find these answers, Greg is in Des Moines, Iowa, to try and confront Jake man to man. He had reached out to Roeper, and asked where he could find the Social Misfit. Roeper had gotten word that Jake would be heading to a local park with Thoren, and relayed the information to Greg. As Greg arrives at the park, his annoyance with Jake continues to grow, as he cannot stop thinking about his lack of assistance against Dawn Lohan. His mind begins to race, wondering if Jake is merely using him as backup for his own protections, and doesn't intend on providing the same assistance to Greg. If this is, indeed, the case, he plans on giving Jake a quick reality check on how things are going to proceed henceforth. That is why he has decided to try and corner Jake, before the two of them head off for a very eventful Breakdown for the two of them. He hopes that having a little "heart to heart" with the other half of the former Tag Team Champions will help get his mind fully back on track, or allow him to bow out of their "rekindling of friendship," before it becomes too late. The longer Greg looks, the more annoyed he gets until he comes over one hill where he sees a man standing on a tree stump in the distance. He squints and can verify, even from a distance, that it is indeed Jake. A moment hits him where his annoyance becomes confusion, wondering why Jake is there dressed in a white robe, and is extending his arms to each of his sides. As that moment passes, and he realizes he has no clue as to why Jake is doing it, he shakes his head, and the annoyance comes back. He is reminded of his annoyance, and he begins to walk toward him. As he gets closer to Jake, he sees a boombox on the ground, and can begin to hear the music blaring out of it. Each step he takes toward Jake, the music becomes more and more discernable, and the lyrics begin to ring out loud and clear. Try your best to win them all As the song gets ready to go into the chorus, Greg immediately walks over to it and bends over to hit pause on the track. Jake goes a bit off balance, as he had been prepared to do something, and looks confused. He turns around, and without missing a beat, address his friend.
Jake Starr: Why did you turn the music off?! Greg fires back.
Greg Cherry: Honestly, I think I'm the one who should be asking questions here... Why are you looking retarded by standing on a damn tree stump, in a park, wearing a dumb robe, and listening to Joe Esposito?! Before Jake can respond, Thoren Holt walks up behind Greg, carrying a pair of chopsticks and wearing a headband with a "rising sun" on it.
Thoren Holt: Retarded he is not... Training he is doing... Jake's head droops, and he jumps down off of his stump.
Jake Starr: Man... if you're going to help me stay inspired, you need to act like you're supposed to! You're the ghost of Pat Morita, not the ghost of Yoda... A voice from off to the side chimes in. Jake turns and is stunned to see Star Wars Kid standing there with Numa Numa Guy.
Star Wars Kid: NO HE'S NAWT! Jake looks confused.
Jake Starr: Huh? Star Wars Kid: YO-DUH NO GHOST! Jake Starr: Ok first, why are you here, secondly, what? Numa Numa guy helps translate.
Numa Numa Guy: Quite honestly I don't know why we're here. Last I knew I was watching YouTube, then POOF we're here... I guess we're like your Patronus... Greg turns.
Greg Cherry: His what?! Jake randomly allows his geek-dom to shine through.
Jake Starr: My Patronus... Harry Potter reference... It's like my guardian angel, of sorts... Real confusing, and completely irrlelvant to what's happening now. He turns back to the pair randomly appearing.
Jake Starr: ... Anyway, now why are you here? Star Wars Kid: YO-DUH... Jake interrupts.
Jake Starr: Yeah yeah... Got that... Now into normal non-mongoloid speak? Numa Numa Guy: ... Basically Yoda wasn't a ghost. Jake Starr: Figured that part out... Numa Numa Guy: Well Yoda actually became a Force Spirit, rather than a ghost... I think he just wanted to be sure we were being factual with our Star Wars banter. He tends to have a conniption if we don't... Jake Starr: How'd he even know I said that? Numa Numa Guy: I quit asking questions... Made my head hurt... Jake Starr: Ok well... Thanks for the interlude... Jake turns back to Greg, and then remembers something. As he turns back to address the random pair, they have "vanished," but Jake sees Star Wars Kid running off in the distance, with Numa Numa guy walking at a much slower rate. He then turns back to Greg and Thoren.
Jake Starr: ... So where were we? Thoren Holt: I screwed up my aparitions... Jake Starr: Oh yeah... Thoren immediately squints his eyes and looks over at Greg.
Thoren Holt: HAI! Greg looks confused at the whole situation.
Greg Cherry: Ok... What is going on? Jake Starr: Well apparently I made the mistake of calling Yoda a ghost, and in future references to Return of the Jedi he's actually... Greg cuts him off.
Greg Cherry: NOT WITH THAT! With... THIS... Greg points to the stump, Jake's attire, and Thoren's awful stereotype of an Asian gentleman.
Jake Starr: OH... Well I'm the best... And because of that, I am doing what I can to make sure that everyone else sees it... Greg Cherry: By standing on a tree stump? Jake Starr: No... By emulating the best... Ralph Macchio! Greg's jaw drops.
Jake Starr: ... See, I'm learning the ancient art of "Cinima-rate!" Greg Cherry: What?! Jake Starr: Yeah it's the fake karate that actors do on TV. Greg's eyes close slowly in disbelief.
Greg Cherry: You're not the best, stupid! You lost to Ducky... Jake scoffs.
Jake Starr: Meh, that loss was inconsequential. Some meaningless tournament doesn't define who the BEST in SCW is, and you should know that... Greg Cherry: How so? Jake Starr: You lost to some nobody! So does that mean that nobody is better than you, and representative of who is more qualified to say they are better than the other? Greg looks off to the side, realizing Jake's arguement has made a pretty valid point. Jake sees this and smirks.
Jake Starr: ... Un huh... You do see what I mean... Thoren chimes in his two cents, in a very bad Asian accent.
Thoren Holt: You two rename tag team in honor of Great One himself... Greg Cherry: Is this going to be a fat joke about someone cooking? Thoren Holt: No... Team name "Wax On... Wax Off!" Greg rolls his eyes. Jake nods slightly.
Jake Starr: That isn't that bad of an idea! I mean, when I do ask myself, "WWRD," that does come up as a logical answer. Greg Cherry: I'm going to hate myself for asking, but what does WWRD mean? Jake Starr: Oh... That's easy... "What Would Ralph Do?" Greg rolls his eyes.
Greg Cherry: Jesus Christ, Jake... Are you EVER serious about anything? Jake looks at him directly in the eye with a smirk on his face, as he takes a couple of steps forward.
Jake Starr: The short answer is simple... NO! Greg shakes his head in disbelief.
Jake Starr: The fact is, being serious in today's society isn't worth the effort... Greg Cherry: Yeah, well it should be! You and I have some very seriously serious business to tend to at Breakdown, and lately, I've been wondering where your mind has been at. Jake Starr: Yeah, well you don't have to worry about a thing. My mind is VERY obvious about where it's at. Greg Cherry: Well let me just say standing on a stump and practicing your crane kick, Danny boy, isn't giving me high hopes that it's where it SHOULD be... Jake Starr: Well it should! I mean, think about it... Nobody in SCW would expect Jake Starr to bust out a crane kick out of nowhere... Greg Cherry: Yeah, and when you pulled a groin nobody would ever expect it again. The fact is, Jake, you have two matches at Breakdown, and I want to be sure that you're actually going to be around when it's time to shut Shaun Cruze and AJ Helms up... Jake smirks again.
Jake Starr: Greg... Those two will BOTH have their mouths sewn shut, so we don't have to worry a damn bit about that. Having said that, however, the TV Title is DEFINITELY at the forefront of where my mind is at! Greg is shocked that Jake would be so adamant about that.
Greg Cherry: Seriously? You, AGIN, are more focused on a TITLE than on a guy who has been running his mouth and talking crap about us incessantly? Geez... Real shocker there... I don't know why I'm not shocked about that. Are you even CAPABLE of not being so selfish about titles? Jake begins to laugh, and puts his hand on Greg's shoulder.
Jake Starr: Why hello Pot... My name is Kettle! Greg just glares at Jake.
Jake Starr: Don't even act like you're not the same kind of selfish ass that I am, my friend. You are just as guilty of title hungry shenanigans as I am, so don't act like you wouldn't be doing the SAME THING... I'm just ballsy enough to be fucking honest about it, so I'm not going to stand here and bullshit you, sorry! Truth is, Shaun Cruze doesn't deserve more of my attention than a championship match. And Helms, let's be real, he's just jumping into this mix to try and save dear old daddy's tarnished victory lap. Greg Cherry: Well what about me, in this mess, man? I've wanted this match, too. And because I want it pretty badly, I want someone I can rely on to be there for me... Jake's face gets a bit more serious, and he looks Greg in the eye again.
Jake Starr: Greg, do you really think that I'm NOT going to show up? If you do, you're dumb as FUCK because I don't back down from a fight. Yeah, I bailed on Kayl, but that douche deserved it. The truth is, I'm going to make sure that we both get the last laugh, and we walk out on top, just like always. But on top of that, I want to show SCW what it REALLY takes to be the Television Champion. If you look at what that belt is now, it's like Regan Street and Syren, everyone is getting a turn with it! Someone needs to step up, become champion, and bring it some prestige, and that's where I come in. They dicked me over by not letting me have the match when I was SUPPOSED to, so now it's time to make sure that is remedied. Face it... Beating those two yokels will do NOTHING good or bad for either of our careers. Making a championship MEANINGFUL in this play, however, would do everything. And you would make the same decision. You've even said how meaningless Shaun Cruze is... I mean, I do get it. You want that bastard to suffer, and we started that process at Retribution. It will continue at Breakdown, so you can rest assured of that. Greg Cherry: Like I said... I want someone I can count on... You're the one who came to me and told me that there was a big deal about us reuniting, then you leave me hanging high and dry when Cruze comes after me... That makes me feel pretty fucking alone! Jake Starr: You're right... I admit I should have come out there and made sure Cruze got what he deserved, but I was distracted. But think about this... Cruze thinks he's in the driver's seat, right now. After we're done at Breakdown, he won't feel that way anymore. He'll be riding in the back of an ambulance. Greg Cherry: I hope you're right... Jake Starr: I know I am... Regardless of what the stat book says at the end of the night, they'll be looking at us as the BEST in the business. Like I said... Some tournament, one win, one title, none of that defines the BEST, to me. It's HOW you do what you do. Greg just stares at Jake.
Jake Starr: Now... With that being said, I highly suggest you put your gi on, and join me in training... Greg Cherry: Why am I wearing a gi? Jake Starr: Well... I'm Danny LaRusso... Thoren is the corpse of Mr. Miyagi... That makes you Johnny Lawrence! Upside of that is your job is simple... Greg sighs.
Greg Cherry: Let me guess... I'm supposed to "sweep the leg?" Jake smiles, and slaps Greg on the arm.
Jake Starr: NOW you're getting it! Miyagi-san... HIT THE MUSIC! Thoren reaches down and pushes play, and the iconic song from "The Karate Kid" begins to play again. Jake begins to do some "air karate" to the beat of the music, and Greg just stares at him in disbelief. Jake even goes so far to pick up a small twig from the ground, obviously from the tree who's stump Jake was standing on. Jake holds the thin twig between both hands, and breaks it with his head. Greg simply looks on and shakes his head, still unsure of where Jake's head is truly at.
Jake Starr: There is no question that I am the BEST in SCW... Plain and simple! See, in SCW, they have created this tournament called the Best of the Best, trying desperately to show the world who the "single best superstar" in the organization is, but let's be real... It's a flawed and rigged system. It's a misnomer to say someone is the best, because the BEST of this organization isn't created by winning some meaningless tournament. If this were TRULY the BEST of the BEST, it would be to reward the victor. It cannot be a true BEST of the BEST when there's nothing to win at the end... I mean, bragging rights? Really? That is worth putting in EVERYTHING to win? Sure, I wanted to win. Sure I said the tournament would remove all doubt on who the best was, if I won, but the fact is, I didn't, and now I think it's crap. Call me a hypocrite, or whatever, I could give a fuck. The fact is, I didn't care as much as I put forth because I didn't see a reason to. I didn't feel that whoever won was truly the best because people were winning that, if you fought 10 times, wouldn't win those other 9. To me, that diminishes the tournament to a "fun-filled free-for-all," and not a "best of the best." The best is defined simply... Who can BEAT everyone else, and do so without someone looking and simply saying it was fucking luck. If SCW wants to bring some legitimacy to this tournament, if they do it next year, then they are going to have to make it worth my time. They are going to have to make Jake Starr actually CARE. They know, deep down, they NEED ME in that tournament because my voice, my oratory, my everything, is what brings people in. No matter HOW MUCH they hate me, they still are OBSESSED with me. Just like everyone in SCW. Everyone is obsessed with what I say, I do, everything. So if SCW wants to make me care, or make it truly about who is THE BEST, then make it about THE BEST. Make THE BEST prove they are what they say they are. Make the World Champion have to run the table to STAY World Champion. Put every title on the line. Do something. Make it something worthwhile! I am BEGGING them. I am BEGGING them to make the roster fucking care, like they are pretending they do. MAKE IT REAL! Do something with this where I can't go and say it is bullshit. Shut me up and make me have to sit back and actually ADMIT someone else is the best, or watch me become the best outright. Bragging rights aren't shit anymore... Unless you beat David Helms, in which case, IT'S EVERYTHING... But I digress... It's time SCW shook things up in a way that rattled this industry to the core, and I'm giving them the fucking formula. So do with it what you want... Run with it... Experience it... Make it your own... BUT FOR FUCK'S SAKE USE IT! Otherwise, you're just going to be trying to piggyback off of the NCAA with a tournament that doesn't have the same grandeur. And if you don't like what I say about it, fuck off... I'm right... You're wrong! Jake smirks, and continues.
So, back to my overall point... I'm the best. I can beat every fucking person in this business, and EVERYONE knows it. Everyone KNOWS Jake Starr is the EPITOME of what everyone WANTS and DESIRES being in this business. So some tournament loss doesn't make me feel any LESS than the best. And so I am moving on. I'm forgetting this damn tournament even happened, and I'm looking ahead. And there is a LOT ahead of me that is going to be SO MUCH MORE WORTH IT than some damn BRAGGING RIGHTS! And let me be clear... I'm NOT talking about Shaun Cruze! Shaun Cruze and AJ Helms are two individuals who are desperate to use Greg and I for their own personal gain. Am I discrediting them as legit competitors in SCW, no, but am I saying they do NOTHING for my career. I have shown the world that I can go out there and put Shaun Cruze in his place. So what else is there for me there? Why should I waste my time with Cruze, when I have something much, MUCH, bigger to focus on, right now? Don't get me wrong... I'll be there. I'll be there in full force, and I'll be there to punch a hole in Cruze's face. More importantly than him, even, I am going to send AJ Helms back to his dear old daddy, so they can have "father" and son time together, crying about how Jake Starr ruined their momentum. Then AJ can then get angrier, after Da Da tells him he was able to actually beat me before, and then we can have the line we're all waiting for... "YOU'RE NOT MY REAL FATHER!" I mean, seriously... Who DOESN'T think that is said every now and then. Superman comes home and sees AJ having had a little accident in his Underroos, and gets angry, punishes him, spanks his little hiney, and then AJ huffs off and yells that right before slamming his door? I know once AJ showed his little ugly-assed face in SCW, that was my first thought. Well... That and David has to stay retired and not go for the revenge he wants because he did his Derek Jeter/Kobe Bryant/Mariano Rivera year-long, swan song. If he came immediately running back, he would have done that whole charade for no fucking reason, whatsoever. He would look like the complete ASS that he is... So instead of doing that, he's partially contracted his son to do his bidding. Effectively AJ Helms is George W. Bush, and if he ever brings in any running buddies, we can start calling them Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld! Soon we'll have the whole cast of characters in SCW, I would bank on... Regardless of who AJ brings, or what mission he's out to "complete," it won't be enough for he and Shaun to be successful. Those two will be knocked off, and their failure will be something everyone witnesses. They will see these two white knights being slain, and sent back on their shields. Why? Because Jake Starr and Greg Cherry are going to ensure we come out on top, no matter WHAT. We want to embarrass everyone who crosses us... And so I PROMISE you, while I'm completely not bothered or not focused on their match because the end result will be the same... Jake Starr and Greg Cherry laughing their way to the bank, leaving those two yokels in the ring suffering! Jake stretches his neck out.
... But now onto the most important topic of the day... JAKE STARR IS GOING TO BE A CHAMPION AGAIN, FOLKS! SCW decided to be complete dolts and screw me out of my moment of fame a couple weeks back. They decided that MY MATCH for the Television Title wasn't good enough for TV, and now I'm in a Triple Threat match? They decided to SCREW ME over again, in MY FUCKING MOMENT? Well that definitely didn't go unnoticed. This is the same bullshit they allowed at Rise to Greatness, when they didn't encourage Syren to let me have my opportunity BY MYSELF. Now, they're doing it again. They're cock blocking me in whatever way possible, and it's getting REALLY FUCKING OLD, REALLY FUCKING FAST! It's also really bringing their PERSONAL agenda against me out from the shadows where it has been all along. Now the world is witnessing it even more first hand. Everyone is beginning to realize I was just as RIGHT as I have said I was. And when I not only take this Television Championship and not be just another name in the stat book, I will show EVERYONE what it takes to be an endurance champion. I will show the world what it takes to knock people off at every turn. I look at this as the ultimate challenge because this doesn't involve just one person, or one match. This is a new challenger, a new opponent, a new everything every fucking week. This is everyone coming after me every week. This is what I did with the Adrenaline Championship, and this is what I am DAMN GOOD at! Now if you want me to sound selfish, which I know is completely against what I normally sound like, is simple... This would make me the first TRUE Supreme Champion in SCW! I would have won EVERYTHING! I would be, yet another FIRST in SCW! Nobody would be able to say it but me. Jake Starr would be the TRUE Supreme Champion, and would have more credibility than ANYONE else in this entire company's history! In layman's terms... I WOULD BE THE FUCKING BEST! Jake smirks.
It all comes full circle, doesn't it? It all comes back to Jake Starr ending up being the BEST in this industry. This championship means more to me than these two yokels who are in the match with me. Sure, Cain is someone who has been making waves, shocking people in the Best of the Best, and showing that they're worthy of being considered someone on the upswing in SCW. This Raab fuck, I don't know much about him, so we will go with the following... He's a fuck! Fair enough? But let me say... Raab should feel honored and saddened to be in this match. He should feel honored because he's in a match with a legend, and someone who will make HISTORY on that night. He, even in his short tenure in SCW, will be in a match that makes HISTORY. It's something he will forever have tagged to his name, and something he WILL be remembered by. That is something a lot of newer guys don't get in this industry, and he's FORTUNATE to have that chance... But the unfortunate side is that he's in a match with Jake Starr, the NEXT Television Champion, and will be completely overshadowed. He should be saddened because he's just going to be someone who thought he was going to be a champion, but unfortunately had his dreams shattered because the Social Misfit decided it was HIS TIME, once again. Raab's chances of actually winning this belt are also diminished because of SCW's screwing of him as well. He could have had a one on one opportunity to truly step his game up, and beat one person, but unfortunately, they decided he wasn't worth that chance either. So... Sorry Raab! Life's a bitch and then you die. Trust me, it sucks, but you can build a bridge and get the FUCK over it! Unlike me, I dwell and thoroughly enjoy beating dead horsies into submission because it REALLY grates on the nerves of others! Jake gives a thumbs up.
But the champion, I haven't forgotten about in this whole diatribe. I haven't forgotten Vixen Cain, the next female hope for SCW. The woman who is out to become a major impact in this industry. Yeah, bitch, good luck getting through me. I have watched you going out there and trying to make people say, "zOMG LOOK AT THIS BROAD! SHE'S AH-MAY-ZING!" Well I hope all of you fanboys and girls who have been himming and hawing over her realize that I'm about to go out there and burst your bubble, and take out this next big thing, and show the world why I am what I say I am. I know she's been hot lately. I know she can win. I'm not going to say she can't, but the fact is, I am going to say I AM GOING TO WIN! Everyone expects me to have too much on my plate at once, but do you people remember who I am? Do you people remember that I ran with TWO, count them, TWO Championships at one time? Do you not remember that I not only HELD those belts simultaneously, I DEFENDED them simultaneously? Who else can say they've done all of that? Who else has that resume in this match? Not a DAMN person! So who better to prove endurance and show the world what this title can actually represent, than me? Not some dolt or some bitch! Jake fucking Starr motherfuckers! This is something I will not only do, but do better than everyone else before me. I will be the standard bearer of this organization, and lead it into its "next level." It won't be anyone else. It will be the man who will stand alone as the true GREATEST OF ALL TIME in SCW... Breakdown will be a night of history where I take out two chumps, and I take TWO new titles for myself... 1... The NEW Television Champion... 2... THE ONLY SUPREME CHAMPION IN SCW HISTORY! Jake sighs.
Ahh... I can't wait for this. It'll be a night NOBODY will EVER forget! Fin |
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