It's a mentality some were shocked to encounter.

Jake Starr, in particular, has relished in the split attitude revolving around him from the droves of Japanese fans. On one hand, he's been inundated by fans asking for autographs, asking to take photos, making signs showing their support for the World Champion, and simply following him around. On the other hand, he's had a seemingly equal number of fans on the opposing side, taunting, yelling, and giving him hard time. Those fans have had signs accusing Jake of being a "sellout," and also turning his back on the fans. It's a mixture of reactions that Jake not only appreciates, but also feels continues to push him forward in the business.

One thing he has always drawn inspiration and drive from is the reaction the fans give him every time he steps into the ring. Whether they're on the positive or negative side doesn't matter to him. In the end, he wants their emotion to be loud, obvious, and energetic. It pushes him to try harder to get the same reaction every time he leaves the locker room.

Although, admittedly, what drove him to actually make the trip across the Pacific wasn't necessarily the desire to take part in the atmosphere. Having been around as many years as he has, he's seen what the Japanese fans had to offer, and initially wanted to remain at home, and continue to prepare for his match at the End of the Year Special. Instead, he woke up a couple mornings ago, and bared witness to a back and forth conversation between Syren, and fellow member of The Brotherhood, David Helms, on Twitter. The two have admitted their budding friendship continues to grow, and have utilized the tour of Japan as an opportunity to further it. When Jake saw this, he knew he had to make an appearance. The shear thought of Helms and Syren continuing to build a relationship, and in Jake's eyes, defy the unwritten laws of friendship, has lead him to finally take a stand.

After an invitation from an unlikely supporter, Rachel Foxx, Jake elected to make his way across the ocean to make his presence felt, and his opinion known. Jake was able to get in touch with long-time friend, and owner of Las Vegas' famous Golden Nugget Casino, Agent oo6, and charter their private jet across the Pacific Ocean, to Japan. His jet arrived fairly closely timed with the Foxx Global jet, which he was invited to fly on as well. Jake knew the perception of arriving with Foxx Global could be something to further harm the friendship he feels is still able to be salvaged, but did accept an offer from the business conglomerate to transport him around the country.

So after a long and hard contemplation of every possible scenario, Jake finally decided that he had come up with the proper way to address the issue that has ultimately plagued his relationship with his fellow fraternal brothers. In his last promo, he issued an ultimatum. He felt it gave Helms enough time to truly evaluate the situation, but when he found the back and forth messages through Twitter, and the lack of an invitation to join Helms, he began to question whether or not the ultimatum was even worth worrying about anymore.

As the scene opens, a set, again resembling that of the set of Mister Rodgers's Neighborhood is seen. Unlike the two previous occasions, this set has a definitive Japanese flare, with random vertical Japanese banners, artful calligraphy in traditional Japanese characters, Samurai swords, statues of ninjas, and a shrine seemingly dedicated to the Karate Kid, or simply the legend of Pat Morita. The door, rather than being the traditional swinging door, is a bamboo, sliding, somewhat transparent entrance.

The cameras slowly begin to zoom in on the sliding entrance as a silhouette of a man is seen approaching its threshold. The silhouette can be seen apparently removing his shoes, and then taking his place, ready to enter the room on his cue. With a loud "BONG" of a gong, and the stereotypical "Japanese song," the one that is at the beginning of the song "Turning Japanese" by The Vapors, the sliding bamboo door slides open, and Jake Starr stutter steps in wearing a kimono, face painted like a Geisha, arms inside the opposite sleeves, and apparently wearing nothing beneath the garb. He walks down the two steps from the entrance to the main "living room" area. Jake continues to shuffle his way toward a rocking chair, and glances over toward the camera. Jake shows a sense of shock that the camera is there, and immediately turns toward it and bows. He then smiles cheekily, opens his eyes wide, and begins his show.

Jake Starr: Welcome everyone! Minasan, kon'nichiwa! Howdy y'all! I'd like to welcome you all to a SPECIAL EDITION of Mr. Jakey's Neighborhood... I mean Mr. Jakey's Pagoda!

Jake issues another cheesy smile, and thumbs up.

Jake Starr: For the first time ever, I have elected to bring my show INTERNATIONALLY! That's right! I have decided that, what was initially an American show, with an American message, has grown so substantially, that it has officially warranted a chance at an international audience.

In doing this, I know not all of the viewers may not quite understand the English language, and because I believe everyone should understand the message, all of my comments from here on out will be subtitled in 137 different languages, including Swahili!

Jake pulls his arms out of the opposite sleeves of the robe, lifts them up, and points down toward the bottom of the frame. The subtitles miraculously appear, and since this is currently being done in Japan, show many of the calligraphy characters the Japanese culture is known for. As Jake "models" the subtitles, he delivers yet another cheesy smile.

Jake Starr: What ultimately lead me to do this, aside from the rave reviews I've received back in the States, revolves around Japanese television. When I came here, my long time friend, Agent oo6, was gracious enough to give me some copies of Japanese children's programs. He, as a goof, said this would help me become accustomed to the ways of life here in Japan. When I got off the plane, I realized something... Those children's cartoons, or "anime" as they're often called, really were quite inaccurate!

For one, there are no little balls people are throwing out in front of themselves, hatching into little monsters with magical powers, and protecting them!

For two, people here don't have ginormous eyes, and two teeth that engulf their entire mouth.

With that said, one thing that I can say was better about these Japanese shows, over their American counterparts, was the inner message of the episodes. Their inner messages have a much more "mature" feel to them. Rather than being a cookie cutter, feel good, all is well in the end, message, these Japanese shows occasionally have quite a "real" message. It's a concept that I have always wanted to do with this show, but I always felt that in the United States, things had to be much "nicer." So being on this international level, I hope this episode delivers a much more "mature" message!

... But before I can get started... Kids, can you do me a favor?

Jake looks at the camera, smiles, and nods rapidly.

Jake Starr: EXCELLENT! I need you to go get your parents!

... Go on!

... Shoo!

... Don't worry! I'll wait! I won't be going anywhere!

Jake lifts his thumbs up, and strikes a pose, and does everything he can to try and hold it still. After several moments, Jake's eyes begin to shift from side to side. With his teeth still clinched together and smiling, he lowly mutters to someone off camera.

Jake Starr: ... Has enough time passed?

A faint voice from behind the camera gives him the OK, and says that he can commence. Jake breaks the pose, and takes a deep breath.

Jake Starr: Welcome parents! I'm glad you came to join us today! The reason I asked the children to come and get you is because today is a SPECIAL show! It's a show where I plan on being very "adult," and delivering a very "mature" message. In doing so, I wanted to make sure that you were aware of that fact, and ask that should you allow your kids to watch, be ready to answer any and all of the questions your little ones may have! Also, I ask that you be open and honest with them. If these youngins have a question you're a little uncomfortable with, what better time to answer them, than now?

These lessons, I know you're curious, involve boys and girls, and in some cases, men and women. They are lessons that everyone should learn sometime in their life, and honestly if you're watching my show, this is a great time to do so! But, if you, as the parent, feel umcomfortable with me giving these "life lessons," then feel free to change the channel, or turn the television off... Now!

With that decree, Jake strikes another frozen pose. After about 5 seconds, Jake breaks the pose on his own.

Jake Starr: So... Again... Kids, and parents if you've stayed too, welcome to today's SPECIAL show!

Jake sits down in the rocking chair behind him, and tucks the robe between his legs, presumably not to expose himself to the public. He looks up and covers his mouth with one hand, a-la Marilyn Monroe, and giggles.

Jake Starr: ... Tee hee! Even on international television that could possible be construed as inappropriate!

Jake adjusts himself in the chair to get as comfortable as possible.

Jake Starr: Today, we're not talking about books with witty titles, written by wrestlers, we're not going to my magical World of Make Believe, but instead, we're going to be learning, together, about two quality things in life. Both of these lessons stem from RECENT real world events. In fact, they happened between two people I know well, so to ensure their privacy, I plan on changing their names and giving them some aliases, and doing my best to disguise their respective identities.

Now... Our first "life lesson" today is in HONESTY! Yes... Honesty! Honesty is something that, even your parents will say is a trait that everyone should have, and practice on a daily basis. The two people who are responsible for this "event," cannot be honest with the masses, and instead are both living a double life together.

And in order to explain this better, and to truly help everyone understand what happened, I have done a little research of my own. I have gone back and chronicled ALL of the conversations between these two that have had that demonstrate the lack of honesty, due to the perception they then put on in the public. These "events" will be reenacted using the EXACT dialog of the participants, and be done so by two of Japan's most famous, amazing, and AWARD WINNING actors!

Jake takes his two arms, and puts them over each arm of the chair. They respectively vanish behind a table appropriately located to each side of the chair.

Jake Starr: These two have received many accolades for their work in Japanese cinema. I was lucky to meet them, while here in Japan, and even luckier to have them agree to help me depict these "events" for you today!

Jake's arms spring up from behind the tables on each side of his chair. On his right hand now sits a blue sock puppet with an oversized "Hello My Name Is..." sticker, with the name "Lil Davey" on it. On his left hand, adequately enough, a pink sock puppet, with a similar sticker, and the name "Lil Zoey" on it. Jake looks at each puppet smiling and nodding at them, and then up at the camera. The two puppets are then turned to the camera and begin bowing, while a clap track is played over the audio. After the track is abruptly stopped, Jake grins cheekily again.

Jake Starr: Like I said, both of these actors have agreed to recreate the "events" that will help me teach you, my lovely audience, these "life lessons!"

Jake clears his throat, and begins doing the voices for each puppet. The blue puppet receives a manly voice, with an "Arnold Schwarzenegger-esque," Austrian, accent, and the pink puppet gets a very similar voice, only with a British accent. The accents are done in order to ensure the identities of the two parties are kept good and "secret."

"Had a good nights sleep for the first time in a while. My ribs don't feel great, but they're getting there..."

"Glad to know you feel OK! I spent the last few days in the Portland area with (-REDACTED-), trying to cheer me up. Feel a bit better!"

"That's great hun! I'm glad you're starting to get back on your feet. You'll soon get another shot at the Smurf, I know it."

"Yeah, people keep saying that to me. Plus everybody keeps telling me how proud they are of me. Doesn't help though. Plus it REALLY doesn't help that stupid (-REDACTED-) left, and didn't even say goodbye. He said he loved me as well, that jerk!"

"I hate to sound like I'm kicking you when your down hun, but he wasn't exactly a nice guy ya know? Doesn't excuse him though! And you've got (-REDACTED-), remember; she'll be there for you no matter what!"

"My head hasn't been quite right the last few days but last night helped fix that. January 23rd I've got a date with a ladder and my title! Lil Davey, you're ready for December 31st, right? I know you don't want to fight friends, but you can SO do this! I believe in you! KissKissKiss!"

"Thanks hun. I hate the idea that I'm gonna have to go up against (-REDACTED-), but getting over fifty percent of the vote!? I'm stunned!"

"See, I'm not the only one who sees you're way good. What you said gave me strength to challenge (-REDACTED-). This is your reward! It's like way positive karma or something, unlike all the sucky karma everybody else has. KissKissKiss!"

"Yeah, I saw the challenge from the monitor back stage; you've so got this hun, you'll get that title back. Who knows, by the end of January we might both be able to celebrate! Smiley! Kiss!"

"If you win, I'm so totally throwing you a party to celebrate! Working New Years sucks but we can celebrate after. KissKissKiss!"

"That sounds good to me kidda. And if I lose, hell, we'll have a party anyway cos I gave it my best shot! Smiley!"

Jake slowly lowers the pair of puppets gently into his lap. He immediately has that "loving" smile on his face, and tilts his head to the side, trying to give off a nice warming feeling.

Jake Starr: Wasn't that just sweet? I mean seriously... Wasn't it? I mean, all the kisses, smiles, and discussion of secret parties? Just lovely...

Well... I mean it is a boy and a girl talking about how much they secretly care for one another, while yet not being straight forward about it. It is something that really can put the strain on a friendship, don't you think? Don't you think that these two, who obviously have something going on, on the side, are lying to the world, and trying to pull a smoke screen over the eyes of the masses?

I think so!

So maybe it isn't so lovely. Maybe I was a bit wrong!

I tend to think that this is one of those instances where it's similar to Romeo and Juliet. For Lil Davey, he secretly loves his Lil Zoey, and yet, they know that their families won't allow it. Instead, they put on this show for the world, and behind the scenes have covert time together, under the guise of it just being a platonic friendship.

In fact, it almost reminds me of a situation in my life, right now, and I hope this truly helps this point hit home for you guys. I have a friend named David, who has a girl that I, honestly, believe he is seeing behind the back of his wife. This mistress of his goes by the codename, Syren, but her real name is Zoe.

Jake pauses, and looks down at the names of the puppets, and sees the similarities in the names.

Jake Starr: Wow... That's ironic!

Anyway...

See these two miraculously became close, and the best of friends, when Syren's entourage began to have a beef with the "entourage" that David is a part of, and also ironically enough, I am a part of too. The two of them, since that moment, have been virtually inseparable. The two of them have been seen doing quite a bit together, and yet, both continue to insist that there isn't anything going on. It's one of those things nobody believes. Both sides know the truth, but the two of them won't own up to it.

Sadly, I am forced to fight my friend at the end of this month, and I'm partially worried that he will have defected to the "Dark Side," and enlisted her help to ensure he wins. See, lately he's played the role of "superhero." He's not been honest to you guys, the fans, and pretended that he's above and bigger than what he's done in the past. He's become this person who's "above" those types of actions.

Which let me insist, he isn't!

He's lied. He's been a farce. He's pretended to be something and someone he isn't, with the hopes it disguises what is truthfully happening. The truth is, he's just like all of us. He's a man who's found a piece of "side," as it's called in the "Hood" in America, and tried to do a bunch of things to cover it up.

So kids, I want you to realize the lesson here. Lying to your friends, and lying to those who have demonstrated that they are willing to stand by you through thick and thin is a bad idea. It ultimately will come back to haunt you, and ultimately force you to realize that, while you may have hoped for a happy ending, the fact you have betrayed the trust of your peers makes it a nearly impossible task!

After giving his thoughts on the lesson of "Honesty," Jake leans back in his chair, and lifts both puppets back up in the air. He looks at both with a jerking head motion, and a "special" grin on his face. He shows a random sense of excitement, really seeming to believe that these two are, indeed, some of Japan's legendary actors.

Jake Starr: Now, our actors have regrouped, and prepared their "motivations" for the next lesson. The next lesson is one that comes from the mean streets of the United States, my home country. It's a belief and a lesson that has widely become recognized as a "true law" amongst the people, and amongst the social hierarchy of the entire nation. I truly, on a personal note, believe this lesson is one that should be spread amongst all cultures, and across the world...

... This notion is the notion of, and I quote, "Bros Before Hoes."

See, in America, the slang term, "Bros Before Hoes," means pretty much exactly what it implies. It implies that a man should never allow a woman to divide him from his friends, and he should never "select" a woman/girlfriend over that of his brothers/friends.

So, with that all being said, I believe it is time to turn the floor back over to our actors, and allow them to reenact this real world occasion that took place between the aforementioned "Romeo and Juliet" that we spoke about earlier.

Now... Without any further adieux...

Jake dips his head down, as if he is cuing the actors to begin their scene. And with his "cue," he immediately jumps into the voices he has established for each one of the puppets, and commences with his second "lesson."

"Just checked into the hotel with (-REDACTED-). She had an interesting conversation with Lil Zoey over her heels. Never thought I'd see the day!"

"And yeah, I mean hello if there's one thing I know about it's shoes. And makeup. And awesome outfits. Japan is way fun so far (even if it is the wrong day here, which is totally weird). I am so tired of random egos though. Seriously, yawn!"

Jake leans forward, in between the two puppets.

Jake Starr:The next day!

Jake leans back out of the way.

"Good morning Japan! It's 9am, time to get showered and dressed and meet some more happy Japanese fans! YAY! I seriously love going on tour."

"Urgh, morning already? I know this place is called the "Land of the Rising Sun," but dammit, I haven't even been to bed yet!"

"Ok, um, wow... There aren't normally this many American fans at stuff like this, right? Japanese fans are so way dedicated!"

"It's incredible isn't it? There's so many people and yet it's so relaxed... I wish every event was like this, I really do!"

"Oh please Lil Davey... Can we be whisked away together? I want your piece of man meat!"

"Oh Lil Zoey, I heart you! Muah Muah Muah Muah!

Jake forces the two puppets onto each other, and begins simulating various acts. After several moments of "pretend fornication," Jake realizes he's still doing a "children's" show, and returns to his chipper self. He immediately puts on another cheesy grin, lowers the puppets to his side, and continues on.

Jake Starr: OK... So the last part was a little improvisational addendum to the actual conversation, and the subsequent actions may or may not have actually happened. I have no proof either way! Anyway... Believe it or not, there actually was a third member of the cast, but I was told he would be too obscene to be on television. But his name is Lil Jakey. See, in this whole sequence of events, Lil Jakey was never called by his friend Lil Davey about going to Japan, and tackling the wrestling market together. Instead, Lil Davey called Lil Zoey, and they decided to go together.

Now maybe the concept of "bros before hoes" begins to become clear. And, wow this is irony, David, my friend, did happen to come to Japan with Syren, remember, she's named Zoe, instead of asking me if we wanted to have The Brotherhood invade this country.

Jake holds up his hands, then realizes the two socks are still covering them. He quickly rips them off and throws them behind his chair, then proceeds to make the motion of "Wait" with both hands.

Jake Starr: Now now... I don't mean invade as in Hiroshima. I know that's still kind of a sensitive subject here! I meant invade as in, say in America, we had the "British Invasion," when the Rolling Stones and the Beatles made the jump from the UK and Europe with their music to the United States. American artists began to fall by the wayside, while these British pop stars took over the charts. THAT'S how I meant invade.

Trust me! War is bad!

Believe me when I say big boom equals big bad!

... Although to be fair, those Harry Carey pilots did shoot first!

Anyway...

When I got wind that David had come across the Pacific with Syren, I honestly began to realize that, while I gave him time to really ponder his decision, he had already made it. David had decided to commit the "Cardinal Sin" of being a man, and violated the "law" of "Bros Before Hoes." Instead, he opted to openly say what his decision is, and look back at his friends, and in essence, give us all the proverbial finger. He showed his true colors, to his fans and his friends, and honestly, it's what I needed to truly become motivated even further for this match he and I have against one another.

See, you want to know the truth? For a while, I thought maybe David would come to understand that the friendship he had built with me, and the one that had been solidly engrained in stone with Thorn would trump that of some girl. I thought he'd realize that, for one, he has a woman, and for two, this one is a home wrecker and a half. She's simply one of those women who are willing to bust into any man's home, and ruin whatever it is he had going in the past.

He's going to become an unfortunate victim of Karma.

The wrong decisions in life will ultimately come back to haunt you. I wanted him to be smart, and think about everything before jumping off of the cliff, but instead, he failed to grasp that concept, and elected to simply think with the wrong head.

Now, knowing David, and knowing his mental state as I do, he'll argue that I'm doing the same thing with Rachel Foxx. The two of us have struck up a kind of friendship recently, and it was built on respect. She and I have quite a bit in common, and understand where one another is coming from. She is a business woman, who is shrewd and willing to slice the throats of anyone who even contemplates crossing her. She's a woman who, whether anyone likes her or not, is brutally honest, and doesn't try and lie. She doesn't really pander to crowds, and honestly it's gotten her a lot of negative attention. But our friendship doesn't relate to that. I don't see that Rachel Foxx. I see the Rachel Foxx who has been honest and truthful to me, much like Thorn, and at one point, much like David himself. Whether or not we always see eye too eye on fans, it's irrelevant. She'll be brutally honest about her viewpoint, and I mine, and we simply don't discuss it. We accept that we don't have to see eye to eye on everything, to have a friendship built on respect. So we've allowed it to progress in whatever manner it chooses. But at the same time, we also don't go around behind anyone's back, and try and pretend things aren't as they seem.

We're honest about things.

We're truthful.

In that comparison, believe me, there is a major difference!

Jake rocks his chair forward, folds an arm over the robe, and stands back up. He slowly begins to pace back and forth, with one hand tightly holding the lower part of his robe closed. His mood definitively begins to change to a much more serious attitude, from the happy-go-lucky mentality he had been displaying earlier.

Jake Starr: So ultimately, I'm at a difficult point where I've begun to realize what's really going on around me. What I initially believed was a man who truly thought he was doing right by brokering the peace between two rival entities, turned out to be a man who was brainwashed by evil. It's turned out to be a battle I'm realizing I'm not going to win. So I have to look at it for what I can emerge victorious about. I have to look at it as what I can truly do, to make the situation "right," in my eyes.

With everything surrounding this match, and all of the "parties" involved, the only "victory" I can pull out is to remain champion. The only way I can truly feel that this won't be a total loss is to make sure I come away with this championship, and send David away with his little "flavor of the month," and simply wait. The time will come when everything implodes on them, and ultimately he'll come back. As far as I'm concerned, David definitively decided that his friendship to me, and whether he likes it or not, to Thorn as well, means less than his love affair with Syren. But the fact is, when it all decimates in front of him, and he's left with nothing, as a true friend, I'll still be there. I know Thorn will be as well. But for now, I simply must strike the critical blow to David, and make his dream, and ultimately Syren's dream of using him to garner revenge on me, ends in a poof of smoke.

Jake approaches the camera, and the shot gets much tighter on his face.

Jake Starr: David... I hope you hear and see all of this. I hope you, like the rest of the children learn these life lessons quickly, and in your case, before the End of the Year Special. If not, you may give me a run for my money, and honestly, you might get me scared somewhere in there. But in the end, I GUARANTEE, your chance at emerging victorious has fallen to zero. You've encountered a fork in the road, and chosen the wrong path to travel down, and it's time, whether you like it or not, for someone to kick you back to the right road.

I'm not sugar coating anything David. I'm being up front, and honest. By choosing to go and continue this charade with Syren, and basically trying to rub it in my face, you made your decision. So in that regard, my viewpoint on this match has drastically changed. To me, you now represent Infamous. To me, you've jumped ship. You know my thoughts on Infamous, so now accept that they now apply to you. You're one of them now. You're a member of Infamous. You get the prime opportunity to get the belt back, and bring it home to the place Lucas couldn't keep it. So don't be surprised when I fight like any fight I've had against them. Don't be surprised when Jake Starr's rage from their actions begins to come out.

The fans may not approve, and they may feel I've crossed the line myself, but truthfully, when I feel betrayed, then nothing else matters. True fans, and true human beings will understand. They'll know the pain of someone who has stabbed you in the back, and the desire to share the pain with the original perpetrator. At the End of the Year Special, Jake Starr walks in with the SCW World Heavyweight Championship, strikes another dagger into the hopes and hearts of Infamous, and walks out STILL SCW World Heavyweight Champion...

... And if you don't like that, then all I can say is this...

Jake backs off from the camera, and begins to untie his robe. He reaches one arm under the overlap, and the other on the overlap, and proceeds to rip his robe open, exposing that all along he's been wearing a tank top, and a pair of shorts. Around his neck hangs a sign that simply says "BOO!" Jake begins to laugh rather hard and shrugs.

Jake Starr: What? You thought I might be in the nude? Pervert! This is a program for kids! See you next time children!

Jake covers himself back in the robe, and slowly walks off of the set. Before being completely out of frame, Jake turns and bows in a sign, he feels, of respect to his Japanese set. He then completely walks out of frame, and as the camera begins to fade to black, while zooming in on the Lil Davey puppet on the ground, Jake's maniacal laughter can be heard in the distance.

With Jake all but declaring that David Helms has decided against remaining in The Brotherhood, even though many presume he still has the desire to repair the friendship between everyone, and ultimately broker the peace between the rival factions, many wonder how Helms will feel. Jake apparently has reached the end of his rope with the whole situation, and decided to make his point clear. He's ready to fight his "friend" as if he's a full fledged member of Infamous, and is ready to show why he won the SCW World Championship.

With the End of the Year Special lurking on the near horizon, how will Helms respond to this decree from his fellow member of The Brotherhood? What effect could Jake's words have on Helms and his relationship with Thorn, or was Jake right in saying that Helms's actions ultimately be the turning point in their long time friendship? Regardless, many questions and many answers lurk at the final pay-per view of 2010.

Back to Role Play Archive | Home