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Emotions are running high throughout the world of Supreme Championship Wrestling. For some, it's anticipation. Gang Rulz has given many an opportunity of a lifetime, or simply, an opportunity they have worked for. Others, however, haven't been able to share in the anticipation and excitement...

One other in particular...

For Jake Starr, the anticipation and the fire have seemingly left his body, and left him a broken man. It's a side of Jake Starr that has never been shown the light of day during his stent in Supreme Championship Wrestling, nor anytime in his recent "history." He's been used to being driven for success. He's been used to being driven to win.

Now, however, is different for him, and many have taken notice.

Since returning home from Breakdown, and namely divulging, what he has referred to as "what really happened," he's been a relative recluse. With the exception of assisting with the care of his daughter, to alleviate the constant duties from his wife, he's been a veritable enigma in his own house. Few see him, unless he's emerging to get a bite to eat or drink, or seen shifting between his office and his bedroom.

It's becoming a growing concern amongst Jake's friends and family.

As the concern builds, some of the menagerie still collectively living at Jake's house have resorted to asking Roeper if she knows why he's in such a deep funk, or what would pull him out of it. They've asked if he's mentioned anything to her behind the bedroom door, or possibly in the exchange of parenting duties. She continues to say he hasn't been vocal regarding it at all. She says all he seems to be happy about is looking at the face of his daughter. She says she's tried to get through to him, with no luck, and anytime she asks if it's related to wrestling, or SCW, he simply replies with either, "I don't want to talk about it," or, "you wouldn't understand."

One member of the family is slowly beginning to see the bigger picture, and it's the one member of the group who hasn't been hounding Roeper for updates, or contributing to the speculation regarding why Jake is acting as he has been... Jake's father, Jeff. Unlike the rest of the group, Jeff caught a glimpse of Jake's most recent promo when it aired, which they all heard him frustratedly delivering from other rooms in the house. The only thing was nobody could make out what Jake was saying. When Jeff saw it come on, he quickly changed the channel, and left to another room to view it, and began to realize his sons perils.

It reminded him of himself, and his experiences...

He's done his best to play along with the confusion of the rest, hoping not to let on his realizations. He knows, should they realize "he knows," they'd all grill him to try and snap Jake out of it. While that is his ultimate goal, he doesn't want it to turn into an intervention from the family, but more so an ability to relate from one person to another.

As the group continues to squabble, and contemplate how they could pull Jake out of his funk, Jeff excuses himself from the group, and departs the entertainment room. He tries not to show everyone his intentions and inconspicuously makes his way toward Jake's office.

As he reaches the doorway, the door is partially ajar, and he stands where he has a clear view of Jake at his desk. Jake's attention is focused on a piece of paper, and he seems to be writing ferociously, and with a purpose. Jake has no clue he's being watched by his father. Jeff glances over his shoulder to make sure nobody has followed him, or discovered where he has migrated. Seeing the coast is still clear, Jeff takes a silent breath, and knocks on the door...

Jeff Starr: Jake?

Jake replies without ever looking up from his paper. His voice is low, and still definitely showing his feelings are still "down."

Jake Starr: Yeah?

Jeff Starr: May I come in?

Jake Starr: Ok...

Jeff enters the room, and completely shuts the door behind him. Jake, having heard the door close, looks up briefly, notices it is only his father in the room, and without saying a word returns to writing whatever it was he was writing. Jeff slowly begins wondering around Jake's office, but begins to tell his son the nature of his closed-door visit.

Jeff Starr: Jake... I'm thinking that it's time that you and I had a bit of a talk...

Jake, still with his head down, and eyes focused on his writing, replies.

Jake Starr: I'm not interested in some kind of pep talk, Dad...

Jeff Starr: That's good... I guess... Because this really isn't going to be a pep talk.

Jake simply doesn't reply.

Jeff Starr: Jake... I think I know what you're going through. In fact, I'm pretty sure I know exactly what you're going through. It's something I went through several times myself.

Jake, still without looking up, snaps at his father, with his voice elevated, both in volume, and sternness.

Jake Starr: Dad! I said I wasn't interested in a damn pep talk!

Jeff pauses, and turns to face his son directly, still a bit across the room.

Jeff Starr: ... And if you had listened to what I said when I first walked in, and would also listen to what I have to say, you'll realize this isn't a "damn" pep talk.

Jake simply shakes his head, but the motion of his pen writing stops. Apparently he's going to humor his father, and listen, but still not directly look him in the eye.

Jeff Starr: Jake, when I was in the business, I encountered a similar situation to, what I think, is the situation you're going through right now. I had busted my ass for an organization, working my way up the ladder, was told I was going to get the push I wanted, then it was all turned upside down. I was given a gauntlet I would have to run in order to get it. Instead of it being like I had imagined it would be, and had hoped for, they decided to make it something more appealing for the fans, or that's what they said.

Needless to say, I felt gypped. I felt like I was told one thing, then presented a completely different scenario. I felt like I was being singled out because I wasn't a "typical" performer, or backstage presence. I wasn't someone who really played a lot of the backstage games, nor did I want to.

So ultimately... I retired from wrestling...

Jake, even with his eyes down at the paper, can be seen from his father slowly closing his eyes. He also softly mumbles to himself.

Jake Starr: You were right... This ISN'T a pep talk...

Realizing Jake is, at least, listening, Jeff continues on.

Jeff Starr: ... It was a decision that, at the time, I felt was necessary. I felt I was never going to ever get to where I desired to be, so I should just bow out instead of putting myself through any remaining mental stress.

But then, once I retired, and left wrestling, I still kept tabs with my friends. They would tell me stories about what they were going through. It was then that I began to realize that what I had went through, and what I think you're going through, is one of the natures of the beast of wrestling.

It was also then that I began to regret my decision of retiring.

See kid, having certain expectations, then having them turned upside downs is something I remember well. It's, like I said, something that comes with the territory. I remember it well. You need to start remembering that too.

Jake, once again, slowly shuts his eyes, and simply shakes his head. His father knows he's beginning to get through to his son. Jeff knows Jake is beginning to hear what he has to say, and doesn't plan on stopping.

Jeff Starr: Jake, remember back in the OWF? Remember when it became a political struggle to decide who would get to fight for the World Championship? Remember how Kremlin and Jesse got the chances, after you had done a lot more than they had? You stuck around. You fought through all of the politics, and continued to hope things would get better.

It never did.

Things were so corrupt there. Many left, but you stuck around. You were loyal. You believed things would change. You stayed for the fans. You stayed to continue to give them the performance that you have become notorious for. You stuck it out.

In a nutshell, you've stuck it out through much worse, completely out of loyalty. You're someone who would basically allow yourself to continually be crapped on, and continue to take it, simply because you looked for things to get better, and believed they would. You...

Before Jeff can continue, Jake finally looks up. The look on his face shows a man battling between understanding his father's point and someone fighting to believe what he has been saying all along. Jake interrupts his father, and quickly snaps back.

Jake Starr: Do you have a point?! Or are you just trying to tell me what I've done in the past?

Jeff approaches his son's desk. He puts both of his hands on it, and leans in toward his son. Jeff's expression begins to get much more serious toward his son. Jake, in return glares right back at his father. Both men's eyes are firmly glued on the other.

Jeff Starr: Yes, son, I do have a point...

Jake responds in a growly, and stern voice.

Jake Starr: ... Then get to it!

Jeff Starr: All of this shows one thing. All of this had lead me to one conclusion. Since this whole ordeal with this title shot was announced, you quit being yourself. You quit being Jake Starr...

Jake doesn't respond. He simply continues his stare deep into his father's eyes.

Jeff Starr: ... You quit being the Jake everyone knew and loved. You became someone else. You decided that you were going to embrace this mentality of someone who didn't care, and had given up on everything...

Jake snaps up from his chair, gets into his father's face from across the desk, obviously showing the frustration boiling over, and unleashing the emotion that his father, believably, has been trying to bring to the forefront.

Jake Starr: I FEEL GYPPED! I FEEL SCREWED! Everything is caving in around me, and I'm supposed to care? I'm supposed to not have this feeling that my sense of "caring" is worth not giving up on?

Jake begins breathing heavier.

Jake Starr: ... Dad, I'm losing friends, and losing the people around me that I thought I could trust! How am I supposed to feel? HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FEEL?!

Jeff maintains a lower tone of voice, hoping it will calm his son down.

Jeff Starr: You're supposed to always be yourself. You're supposed to always be Jake Starr...

Listen to me... You can't control others. You can't control what decisions other people make, or if they are going to meet your expectations. All you're capable of controlling is yourself, your emotions, and your actions.

Jake's head slumps down.

Jake Starr: A lot of good that does me now...

Jeff Starr: Jake... The answers are there. The solutions are there. You can overcome this, and come out looking better than you ever thought imaginable. You can go into this match, take it seriously, and do what you planned all along. The little I know about this match, you still can become the World Champion. You still have that capability. You simply just need to go in there, pin the champ, then your goal is reached. Stop focusing on the fact others can jump in there and take it from you, or get it before you. It's your chance for the taking...

Jake's head is still down.

Jake Starr: Why would I want to sell out? Why would I want to sell my soul?

Jeff Starr: Jake... You're not. Selling out would be doing stuff to simply get management to give you what you wanted. Selling out involves doing things that compromise your integrity. Your feelings on this match aren't expected to change. People won't expect you to be a "sell-out" if you go out there, try, and simply say you're willing to give it your all. In fact, if you go out there, and give it your all, it's what you've stood for all along. It's what Jake Starr has always stood for.

Son, if you're worried about things like your daughter looking back, being bothered about you and your actions, you need to understand she's not going to care. Quite frankly, she'll ultimately want her father to be himself. She'll want her father to be Jake Starr. She doesn't want some shell of her father trying to be a poignant philosopher, when she knows, and will know then, that's not her...

In a nutshell, you need to be the same ass you've always been since the day you were born.

Jake's head tilts to the side, and shows signs of a smile. It's the first smirk Jeff has seen out of his son since all of this began.

Jeff Starr: Son, when you were born, the doctors referred to you as one of the most difficult births he's ever been a part of. All he kept saying to your mother and I, after the fact of course, was that you were one of the most stubborn babies he's ever been fortunate enough to help enter this world.

Hearing that makes Jake shake his head, but utter the sounds of a slight bit of laughter. His head settles, facing back down, and biting his bottom lip. Jeff, seeing this, finally has the guaranteed proof that he is definitely getting through to his son.

Having Jake's defensive guard down, Jeff returns to the subject, hoping that the message gets through.

Jeff Starr: Jake, you have an opportunity in front of you to go get what you earned. You have a chance to go out there and get what you deserve. The only thing is, you're going to have to make the choice to quit being down on the situation, quit being down on the fact it isn't perfect, and step up to the challenge...

Jake's brief "happy" moment is quickly ended, and he's returned to reality. His expression changes, back to the serious, and almost emotionless gaze he's had the entire time. He finally does, however, look up and stare his father in the eye.

Jeff Starr: Son... I know the situation isn't perfect. I know it's not everything you had hoped for. I know it isn't exactly what you planned. I know this. I understand this. But regardless, it's your chance to shine. It's your chance to go out there in front of the millions who you entertain time after time, and show them you're still "the guy." You have a chance to prove to them, without a shadow of a doubt, Jake Starr is still "the man," and "the guy to beat." It's yours for the taking...

Jake stands up, and looks up toward the heavens. He lets out a loud and audible sigh, and rubs his face. He exhales loudly, and listens as his father continues.

Jeff Starr: ... I made this mistake Jake. I bailed before I had the chance to right the wrongs that I was dealt. I've regretted it day after day. I was too "proud" to return, when I realized it was one of the dumbest moves I ever made, and I just don't want to see you go through and suffer through that same ordeal.

After all of the silence he's had through his father's words, Jake finally lashes back. His voice, once again, elevates, and the frustration is evident.

Jake Starr: WHAT ABOUT MY FRIENDS, DAD?! What about the fact it's a almost a damn inevitability that someone is going to piss someone else off? What about the fact that the odds of me maintaining these friendships past this stupid pay-per view are slim?

Jeff, once again, keeps his voice calm, hoping the calmness will spread eventually to his son.

Jeff Starr: Jake, if they're really your friends, in the end, you and them will pull through this.

Jake sighs again, and rubs his hand around his mouth.

Jeff Starr: Son, you're not in control of anyone but yourself. You need to go out there, and simply be Jake Starr. That's what the fans want. That's WHO the fans want to see, and ultimately, it's what YOU want to BE! It's time for Jake to be Jake once again!

Jake Starr: Dad, I don't know! I...

As Jake goes to continue responding to his father, Jake's phone begins to ring. His phone, which has been sitting on his desk all along, is picked up by Jake, and looks at the caller ID. He sees the name "David Helms" flashing on the screen, and takes a deep breath.

Jeff, completely unaware of who is on the phone, tries reading his son's body language, and gets no reading.

Jeff Starr: You going to answer that?

With those final words, the scene slowly fades out with Jake staring at his phone, and debating whether or not he's going to actually answer the call.

With his father's words of wisdom to his son, the question looms whether or not they got through to him. He knows that what his father was trying to get across was a fact. He knows his father is ultimately right. The problem is if he'll be able to swallow his pride, and ultimately go back to being the Jake Starr that the world has become accustomed to. If he can mentally come back to being the person everyone knows, he is, arguably, the most dangerous man in the match at Gang Rulz. But if the defeated, and beaten, man, that SCW fans have seen recently is who arrives, the writing will be on the wall. The end result will be just as prophesied by Jake himself.

So what will we see? Jake Starr, the new SCW Champion? Or, Jake Starr, the final bow?

Jake Starr: A wise man once told me, "it's time for Jake to be Jake again." It's something that I've really had to toil and battle with, in the hopes that I could fully understand what it meant, and what it entailed.

It's something that caught me off guard, but I think it was something I needed to probably hear.

See, lately, I know all people have seen from me is a person who has been extremely defiant, extremely angry, and at times, extremely defeated. I've been angry. I've been upset. And in all honesty, I probably still am. I probably, deep down still have that anger. The problem is, the whole "be Jake again" idea, really made me try to figure out what exactly made me mad.

Was it the fact I worry about my friendship with David and Tommy being strained?

Was it the fact I was expecting something different, as far as the match rules and regulations went?

Truthfully, I think it was a combination of many things. I think it was a lot of things rolled up into one, and snowballing on me all at once. It was something that literally forced me into more sleepless nights, which were somewhat of a blessing for my wife, since she didn't have to wake up when the baby needed something. But nevertheless, it plagued my mind. I couldn't pick out exactly what it was that bothered me the most. I couldn't specifically identify what it was that had sent the rage through my body. All I knew is that it was all I could think about...

... So I vented...

... I blasted everyone I thought was responsible...

Ultimately, my reasoning for doing so was to get it off of my mind. If I didn't, it would have sat there. It would have continued to plague me, and continued to warp my sense of reality to the point I would have accepted my next move of leaving the industry, and running away from what I saw as the evils that were caving in around me.

Again... So I vented...

It wasn't received real well. I was given many-a phone call about it. I was told basically where I could stick it, but it never really sank in.

Sometimes it takes a loved one to truly begin to help things make a little more sense.

Since my "reality check," I really began to think about trying to figure out what EXACTLY it was that had pushed me over the edge. Yeah, I was irritated about the stipulations, yeah I was irritated that it wasn't meeting my expectations, but ultimately, it wasn't what pushed me over the edge. Neither of those factors were what truly did it to me. Neither of those factors truly made me angry and as upset as I was... Hell, maybe as I still am, I truly don't know...

Jake takes a deep, and solemn breath.

Jake Starr: ... Neither of those were "it." But, I am pretty sure I've figured out what caused everything. I'm pretty sure I've figured out why I was so bothered, and why I was so perturbed by the whole thing. It's something that most men wouldn't admit to. It's something that, hell, most wrestlers wouldn't think of owning up to. But, if anyone is going to ever understand what drove me over the edge, they're going to have to understand the reason I flipped my lid...

... Truthfully... The match scares me.

Yeah, it's true... This match had put the fear of God into me, simply because it's the same match that I've faltered in the past. I realized that this match, and it's similarities to Tactical Warfare have put me in a spot where, ultimately, I don't have the numbers on my side.

I don't have the advantage I hoped to have.

I hoped to be able to walk in versus Lucas, knowing he knows he's fallen short against me in the past. I hoped to walk in knowing he would have already lost once to me, when a title was on the line. Instead, it's similar to the night the very belt I seek was taken from my waist. It's not my opportunity, it's several people's opportunity. Yes... It's my opportunity to become SCW World Champion... It's also a chance for Greg to achieve his goal of becoming World Champion again, Thorn to reclaim the World Title from Lucas, and at the same time, have Dark Fantasy reclaim the SCW Tag Team Championships from Greg and I.

The odds just aren't there for me.

So the fear shot through my body. The fear made me try and find reasons to lash out about the match. Fear never wants to rear its ugly head as the source of the panic, so it displaces itself onto other things. It forced me to think it was a combination of other reasons that this match just wasn't "right," instead of the fact, I'm literally scared...

Jake begins to pace back and forth.

Jake Starr: So, yeah... There you all have it. My fans know a dark secret about Jake Starr. Hell, everyone going into Gang Rulz knows the dark secret about the man striving to reclaim his throne atop Supreme Championship Wrestling.

So what now? I've most likely discovered the source of my bitterness, and admitted that the thought of "Jake Starr being Jake Starr" is one that I desire, and I know my friends, fans, and family all do too. But it's not something I can just "jump into." As much as I would like to simply do a personality 180, and go back to my complete sh!t talking ways, I know it would simply come across as fake, and not be something anyone believed. In time, it's possible, but right now, I can only say that the transition to returning to "me," has hopefully begun.

It'll be a definite "gradual" process...

Jake stops pacing, still wish his shoulder facing the camera. He slowly begins to turn his head to face the camera, and then turns the rest of his body to face the same way. He slowly elevates his head slightly, and begins looking "down his nose" into the lens.

Jake Starr: Nevertheless, there's a part of me that never will go away. There's a part of me that has never changed, even though I've been out of my element, so to speak. That's the part of me that wants to become the SCW World Champion again. That desire, that feeling, that yearning has boiled inside of me since the minute I watched Josh Hudson steal the World Championship from under my fingertips. Every passing moment that I haven't been the World Champion has seemed like an eternity. Granted, part of that time I was proud to serve along side my friend Thorn, as he reigned "Supreme," I still had that fire.

It's a drug. Being World Champion, and being number one, is an addiction. It forces you to ignore friendships and alliances. It forces you to realize it's where you want to be. It ultimately hooks you from the minute you get that initial dose.

I can admit, I had a taste, and I was immediately addicted.

I've yearned for this chance, and now, I know what I have to do. I have to look back at Tactical Warfare, I have to look back to Taking Hold of the Flame, and I have to learn from those experiences. I have to take the fear that those two matches have put into my soul, and I have to overcome it. I have to prove to myself, and prove to the world, that if it's going to be something that I have to best a number of others to achieve, and not just one person, I can do it. I have to go out there and prove this isn't something I should fear. I have to show myself I'm better than what my brain is telling me I am.

I can't allow myself to slip up in another match like this.

Ultimately, I have to go out there, and not only be the one to prove I'm the one superior to Lucas Knight, once again, I have to prove that I can outsmart two men, one of which I see as almost family. I have to not fall victim to what I did at Tactical Warfare. I can't let my eyes slip off of the prize. It has always been my downfall, and I have to overcome it.

It's as simple as that.

If I want to become the SCW World Champion again, I have to get past my fear. If I want to achieve MY GOAL, and put the past behind me, I may have to simply do things that may not be well received from my friends and allies. I have to go out there, and do exactly what I know I must do to win... Truthfully, I know Thorn and Greg will both be looking to do the same. I don't fault them. I don't fault them. If they try and keep me from winning, honestly, it'll be something I would have expected. We all are after one common goal. We're all after that one prize. Whether we're a "team" or "individuals," in the end, we're all looking to win. We're all looking to pin Lucas Knight...

... One of us will emerge victorious, and a new World Champion WILL be crowned. When the dust settles, when the smoke clears, and when the assumptions have left the minds of the masses, everyone will look into the center of the ring in shock. The world will be in awe over what just happened. The world will bare witness to the second reign of Jake Starr as World Champion.

Fear, or no fear, I plan on ending 2010 the same way I ended 2009... SCW World Heavyweight Champion!


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